Sushi breath!!!!

There's this Chinese guy sitting right beside me and he smells like sushi or whatever. Its BAD! God, I'm not racist, I swear but he smells horrible! and he yawns on top of that. like seriously, if my mouth smelled this bad, I would make every effort to not even talk so as to not open it. Some people! I feel like offering him a piece of gum!

Anyway, so mom didn't call today...Dad kinda told her off when she called yesterday at 3:00AM...I'm guessing that's why she didn't call today. I hope thats why. I tried to call her twice in the morning but she didn't pick up...so yeah.

cooking is good, so far. I made this Spanish dish yeterday...I thoguht it was good. We still have some leftovers so I don't think I have to cook when I go home today.

I have to catch up on my school work though. Im so behind. And now I really want to switch my seat! GOD CHINESE PEOPLE!!!!!

Mini-Nightmare

I came back from work yesterday and fell asleep...for 2 hours which obviously wasn't enough but thanks to Zahra and her friends, I woke up at 11:00pm. I was actually worried about what to cook for lunch too so it wasn't just Zahra. A whole bunch of things really. I went grocery shopping and bought Zahra's shoes...By the time I got home, I was dead! I could swear I had a full blown myotic reflex episode. I went to bed, but couldn't really sleep. My muscles were hurting a lot...Eventually though I fell asleep...at like 8:49pm or something. I had set up the alarm clock on my cell phone to 10pm because thats when I had to be ready for work. but yeah...I woke up at around 9:50 to this loud scream! It was so loud that I almost had a bursting-out feeling in my ears! And then I had a very very quick flashback of mom's face. I don't know what it is..Scary nightmare. I'm scared. Really scared. I'm afraid she's sick or something....I'm waiting for her to call. But I'm gonig to text her in 30 mins. ugh when is she coming back???????

till next time

Called mom again

She's doing alright I guess. She said the people are nice to her etc...She's leaving to Iraq either tonight (12:00AM Amman's time so around 6pm our time) or tomorrow morning. She's not going by airplane anymore. She said the people at airfrance gave her a VERY HARD TIME that she doesn't want to get on an airplane anymore! I wonder what these mofos did to her...but hey I should also keep in mind that the 'X10' gene runs in our family...

Anyhow. I pulled an all nighter yesterday. Our essay sucks. Our analysis is jokes. Ugh and we're running out of time. I hate this. But oh well.

Till next time

Just called mom

I just got off the phone with mom. She's doing alright...she said they waited for her at the airport and it was nice and smooth. I hope she's more relaxed now. Yeah. That's it.

Now I'm off to 'officially' work on my essay, I think I'll pass on lunch because I'm running out of time.

Till next time.

"Arried" Says Queen Alia's airport!

But AF hasn't announced it yet. I'm starting to feel like AF doesn't announce arrival until all passengers are off the plane. I just hope everything works out for her! I'm praying!!!! QAI flight schedule is so Third-World!! See above for schedule 'design'. Click on the image to enlarge.

Ok, breaking news! AF just announced it!!!! It arrived at 6:30PM! yaay

Alhumdiallah! Now I'm waiting for her call!!!!

Just as an aside and for future reference (if mom decides to take the plane from Amman to Baghdad), I found IA's webiste. It's pretty neat and it's very recent. Much better than QAI hahaha. Here it is: http://www.iq-airways.com/AirqAirways/

Till next time.

It's 11:40AM

I'm at school and it's 11:40AM and the airplane hasn't arrived yet! It was supposed to be there at 11:34AM our time! I don't know what happened! The flightview thing is not working because Queen Alia Airport doesn't support the service. Cowards. I'm gonna check to see if the flight has arrived on their website. Ohhh I get it! She's gonna arrive in an hour insha'Allah. Because it's 5:44PM Amman's time. So she'll be there at around 6:45 PM their time which is 12:45 our time. Makes sense. Ahhh freaked me out. I hope everything works out. Moe, if you're reading this (as I sent you a txtmsg directing you where to go for further updates on the trip etc, I understand that I sound pretty cocky but shove it, I'm trying to play a mother figure here....but I swear it's just happening...naturally. I freaking eat Breakfast at Timmies everyday, almost everyday. But for some reason when I bough my 12 Grain begel today, I felt guilty. Guilty because I thought about what Shams and Zahra are eating right now...Mind you there's all kinds of things at home but Zahra likes begels. It's so weird. This never happened to me. I don't know what it is but I'm worried. So worried! Call me.)
Back to what I was saying. I didn't get anything done last night of course and kept waking up throughout the night. I feel so sorry for mom. She got there at 1:2oAM Paris time, which means that she had to sleep somewhere. poor her! I bet you her legs are all swallon now.
I asked Saif to call me as soon as she gets there but I kinda regret it now. Mom and Dad asked me to send him my cell so he may update us etc. But he didn't even reply back to my message. Oh well, maybe he just didn't go online on facebook yet (I sent it through mom's facebook).

Oh AF changed the arrival time! It's 6:33PM now. GOD the Arabic saying goes like "I'm sitting on fire" That's exactly what I'm going through now. Sitting on fire! Oh and my back hurts from freakin' carying that big black bag! I hope it doesn't get ripped. I don't know what mom will do. I had a had time pulling it for less than 10 mins. Allah yesa3edha!

I hate airplanes! I hate airports and most of all, I hate ARABS!

More to come.

Landed, Alhumdiallah!!!!!

Oh my Goodness! I kept on refreshing the page over and over. One of the websites says that the flight's status is Landed and the other one says not yet. I don't know, I should hear from AF's website by 1:20AM. The flight view shows the plane positioned right on Paris. Gosh, now I can go to sleep. Her next flight takes off at 1:20PM Paris time...which is like 7AM our time. It should arrive in Amman at 6:45PM which is around 12ish our time. I'll update this blog with pictures/info of her next flight if God Wills.

AF's website is taking a long time to announce it! Ugh, I guess they're trying to be 'sphesticated'. arrrrrrrrgh. It's 6:22AM their time and they're supposed to announce it at 6:20AM. I'm getting worried now! Ya Allah why aren't they announcing it???? I'm so frustrated now. I don't think AF is going to announce it. But oh well. CDG said that its status is Landed.

I should go to sleep now.

Still waiting...

It's 12:46AM here and I'm still waiting. The website gets updated every 30 mins or so, so it's not bad. I can't fall asleep. I wanna make sure that she landed safely. Here's a picture of what the view looks like. They're actually pretty close. Ya Allaaaaaaah!

Pearson International Airport SUCKS!

WHAO What a day! Mom was almost gonna miss her flight tonight! My goodness we arrived 3 minutes before the airplane took off. We were stuck in traffic and it just never occured to us that it's March Break (i.e. high volume of passengers etc) It took us forever to find a parking spot. Anyhow, by the time we got there, they told my mom that the gates were closed that she had missed her flight. She begged them to double check and one of the airplane staff said that they might be able to accommodate for one more passenger if she can make it to the gate in 3 minutes. Poor her, she was terrified. We all panicked! She was gonna lose her money. Anyhow, so they charged her $100 for overweight which was BULL! It was obviously a late penalty. I hate them! They talked to my mother as if she didn't know a word in English. She simply panicked and didn't know what to say. She's a prefectionist like me and when things get out of control she freaks out. I couldn't take it though, I told one of the staff that "We appreciate the instructions however by telling us that we have 1 minute left when she's checking-in/taking out stuff from her luggage/paying for the extra weight, he was making things even worse." He shut his mouth then. Her flight was supposed to be at 5:55pm but the mofos wanted to leave earlier so they closed the gates at 5:40pm. That's a 20 min difference! And you know what, it makes a whole lot of a difference when you're panicking! God I hate them! I feel so sorry for mom. She was running and her face turned so pale. We didn't even get to properly say goodbye. I gave her a big hug but that was it. The guy kept on saying "Come on, they're closing the gates. You have 2 mintues left". Idiot. Zahra cried, she broke my heart. Ugh anyway! I just pray that she gets there safely.

I was tracking her flight a few moments ago on the Charles de Gaulle International Airport. It's pretty cool actually, it shows you a flight view that has the dep./arrival info as well as the airplane's speed and other informations that make abseloutely no sense to me. I'll attach a picture of the current view. I'm worried though. She's gonna arrive there at 5:46AM paris time which is almost 1:00AM our time. I don't know if she'll give us a call but I hope so. I'm really worried. I'm shaking as I'm typing.

I have to work on the essay too, but how can I when my mind is so occupied??? I wish I could call her and make sure that she's okay!

Ya Rab! Ya Allah. I pray for her safety.

Till next time.

Leaving tonight

I'm scared. I keep having bad feelings. Bad thoughts. I wanna keep this short, I'm not in the mood of blogging anyway. But yeah my mother is leaving tonight at 5:55pm. I hope she comes back safe, Amen.

My essay is gonna suck. I haven't even started yet and its due on Thursday. ughhhhhhhhhhhhh I wanna scream.

I love you mom

Samsung m530, baby!

I finally got my phone yesterday! and it is HOT! well I think it is lol my mom thinks its big, huge and ugly. it's white and it flips. I'll try to to upload a picture of it. But yeah I downloaded a new ringtone, elissa's ayami beek! I love that song.

I'm at work. I don't feel tired today at all, I had 2 hours of sleep before coming...I really want to go shopping tomorrow. I dont know if I can do it though. The mall closes at 5pm and by the time I get home, rest and eat its probably 3pm or something. I don't think its worth it. But I don't know when I can go! I still have to work on the psychology assignement, its due on Thursday and Zahra wants me to go shopping with her for trip. I'm gonna be super busy and plus mom is leaving on Tuesday...ugh! I'm seriously thinking of hiring a housekeeper!

Till next time...

Almost there but running out of time.

Two more chapters to go. ugh! I am getting sick of BM! I was going to blog today in the morning but I felt discouraged by the fact that I only got 2 chapters done yesterday. I honestly tried. But I was exhusted by the time I finished those two chapters and then I met up with someone for lunch etc...point is by the time it was 5pm I wasn't in the mood of doing doing anymore studying.

Still haven't decided what I want to do my project on. Lots of options but I still don't have a plan. I want to get those 2 chapters done before I start reviewing which will only happen when I go home as I need to read things outloud and think of examples that apply to the theories.

Sounds like a plan to me but I'm almost certain that I won't be able to follow it. I should be optimistic. Oh well. I can't wait to finish my exam so I can go shopping. I need to update my closet.

Shams lectures me about the way I dress up almost everyday lol. She's kinda right. I don't pay much attention to my appearance these days. I'm just behind in school and trying to catch up. I have abs. no time to 'beautify myself' as she puts it. Kinda sad but what do I do? and plus hoodies and jeans and sneakers are very practical. Not dressy but practical. I actually tend to get more done when I'm dressed up comfortably and for me thats when I wear practical, simple things. Sometimes even wearing a 'fancy scarf' can bother me. Can't believe how picky and sensitive I can be.

Anyhow, I better get back to chapter 11!

Till next time.

School

Just got here! I have to cover at least 4 chapters today, ughh! And I have to meet up with someone and discuss the essay and I'm tired. I don't know why, I slept well, had breakfast. I don't know. I just need to motivate myself somehow. I thought I would blog or plan how I'm going to approach those 4 chapters before I get started but I don't know how to divide up my time. There's 4 chapters and I don't even know when the girl wants us to meet up. So it's all up in the air today and I have a feeling that I won't get much done. But oh well, I'll try my best.

I have to get a hold of the movie mississippi burning as soon as possible so I can start analyzing it. I don't really like the fact that our analysis will be concerned with overt racism. It's really straightforward. I find modern racism more interesting. But that's just my opinion and I'm working with another girl and her opinion counts as well of course. So we'll see what we decide on today.

I will probably do some more research before I go back to studying for the exam. I need to be prepared.

Till next time

Big loss...

Couldn't get anything done yesterday. My uncle (mother's gaurdian) passed away on Sunday, 03/8/09. She was very hurt. I had just come back from work when I heard the news...It was sad. He died of bone marrow cancer or something like that, his body won't generate RBC. But oh well, he's in a better place now and that's for sure. But yea we were at Anna's house last night, stayed there until 11:30PM so by the time we got home I had no energy to do anything. I crashed into my bed and woke up in the morning to hear my mother cry and moarn. He raised her. I don't blame her. I wish I could be there for her but I have an exam on Thursday. I'm at school right now...I hope I can get something done today, if I don't then I'm majorly screwed up! I literally have to cram 4 chapters/day. Kinda impossible but that's the plan, the 'urealistic plan'. Oh well, I'm gonna get started in 10 mins, which means that I need to get off the computer right now lol.

Funny I shouldn't be laughing or listening to music (which I am right now, Im listening to Kelly's Beautiful Disaster. I love that song!)

Anyhow, I'll try to blog again tonight

Till next time

Motivation

I need to get up and go to school...I know it's saturday but I can't seem to get anything done at home. My laptop is such a distraction, my mind is so occupied and my bed is so seductive! But I have work tonight! I don't know I don't know. I'm soooo lazy today and for some reason I feel confused. I don't know why...Just very confused. Maybe I'll go for a walk...ugh I need fire in my butt to get me started. I'm not motivated at all! Where are you Vanessa??

I called Bell yesterday, had an argument with them about my LG phone. Its been giving me a hard time...the battery got chipped off and now it comes off very easily, it doesn't work anymore. They're going to ship a new phone to me, Samsung m530 I think. I seen pictures of it but I really don't know if I'm gonna like it, and I don't trust Bell Mobility. They renewed my contract for 2 more years. But oh well, it's all good.

I NEED MOTIVATION

"Die Jew, get the hell off campus"

In an article about hooliganism in Canadian universities, Gil Troy, a Zionists Jewish professor at McGill University, addresses the incident that took place recently at York University. According to the article and many other articles online, 20 Jewish students at York were held hostage in Hillel while pro-Gaza protesters shouted "Die b*tch, go back to Israel" and "Die Jew, get the hell off campus".

I personally wasn't there to witness what happened and none of the youtube videos that I watched show such racists remarks but nonetheless I am not surprised. I am not surprised because prejudice is powerful. While its nothing new and almost everyone nowadays is aware of the conflict between Jews and Arabs, this time the case is different and quite interesting for a Psychology student. This time the remakrs are very overt, direct, and describe what psychologists call "old-fashion racism". Fifty years ago, such negative remarks might have been somewhat tolerated but now, in 2009, these things shouldn't be said and if they are, something serious must be done about them. And by saying that I'm not supporting Zionism. I'm trying to stay as objective as possible. Just looking at the issue as an outsider.

Makes me wonder.

What is it that's motivating these young people? How's this hate fueled? Where's this energy coming from? Who's behind all of this 'brainwashing'? I don't know who the pro-Gaza protesters were but I'm assuming that they were Arabs, Palestinians or Muslims in general. Whoever they are, they must deeply despise Jews. Which makes me wonder...Why??? Why would anyone be willing to put their academic future in jeopardy just to piss off some Jewish students? It really makes me wonder.

Things like this incident make me think that religion promotes prejudice. I'm not trying to blame this on Islam, as any religon put in the hands of the wrong people can turn into a weapon or as the saying goes, "its the artist, not the paint". But I can't deny that religion somewhat forces its adherents to think in categorical terms. Which brings me to the question, how do these students categorize Jews? How do they expect Jews to categorize them? I'm pretty sure the minute you mention the word "Jewish" these students picture violence, blood, destruction, IDF and the likes...Whether it be imagine or real, these cognitive constructs are dangerous and they unfortunately lead to further strong negative feelings. And being the human beings we are, sometimes we lose 'control' and let it out, which is exactly what happened at York Univeristy. I'm 100% sure that these students are aware that such remarks can get them in serious trouble, and yet they went ahead and 'let it out', unconsciously. I gave up on thinking about how these cognitive constructs even came about. History is too complciated for me and you gotta look at both sides (which happen to have two completely different stories).

I'm just thankful that these things don't happen at U of T...or at lest not yet. We seem to enjoy a very multireligous atmosphere. Ah, it makes my brain hurts. It's sad, very sad.

It makes want to stop blogging. In fact thats what I'm going to do. I need some fresh air. I just wish that these students would direct their energy toward something useful...

till next time.

Been a while

It's been a while (2yrs) since I wrote my last (and first) blog. Many things have changed since then...I'm still in university though, 4th yr but not last. I'm probably gonna stay for one more year...still head off toward the unknown and it feels horrible. But at least I'm kinda over med school...I've come to realize that I don't have what it takes to be a doctor...I am a little more honest with myself these days...more realistic about my future goals and my potentials/shortcomings which is a good thing I guess...so long as it doesn't limit me from reaching my realistic goals. By realistic goals I'm refering to grad school. I still hate UTSC a lot. In fact, I'm starting to hate Toronto as a whole but that's something I'll blog about later on as there's more important stuff on my mind.

Mom is leaving in a week. I'm scared to death. Not becaues of responsibility really, although I do think that it's going to be difficult, but because of the situation over there. She's planning to stay there for at least a month if not two. Meaning that she will be gone while I have exams which is a bummer because I have to cook, clean, wake everyone up in the morning, put up with their BS and attitude AND study AND go to work. I don't know how I'm going to handle all of this...It's scary and the last thing I want to do is get Cs and Ds on my trascript!

I really shouldn't be on the computer right now. I have a midterm on Thursday so that's like in a week but I have 12 chapters to cover in 5 days (I don't count Sunday and Monday, these two days are my 'Sabbath'). I'm not even in the mood of blogging. I'm just blogging because I'm bored. I was reading the newspaper in the morning and came across an interesting article about the conflict in the middle east...But I really don't want to discuss it here because this one is supposed to be more, well, personal I guess.
Anyhow, I'll end this blog with a nice quote I came across while I was surfing the net today, it goes like this: "Deprived of meaningful work, men and women lose their reason for existence; they go stark, raving mad"---Fyodor Dostoevsky

Till next time.